Horror Stories Told With Glee

There are many interesting facets to being pregnant - the food cravings, the unpredictable morning sickness, the unexplainable but copious amounts of gas. Yes, that's right, I have become a walking gas attack. Lucky me.

But there is one thing about pregnancy that COMPLETELY surprised me. And it's doesn't have anything to do with my pregnancy, per se. Whenever I tell someone (both friends and strangers) the "good news", I am then treated to a LONG tirade about how difficult they had it during pregnancy AND childbirth. They happily regale me with tales of their morning sickness (going into great details, and ignoring the fact that I'm getting greener as I stand there fighting off my own bout of nausea), their heartburn, and countless other ailments. The more disgusting, revolting, or bloody the problem, the happier they are to tell me all about it. And don't get me started on the birth horror stories. Needless to say, misery loves company, and these women are not afraid to tell all the details to guarantee my captivity in their company. I have wanted to shout, "I don't want to hear about it! Can't you see I'm going to puke all over you unless you let me get to the bathroom?!?" I have wanted to scream from the rooftops, "I'm sorry you had such a bad experience, but could you please be a little more considerate of my experience and STOP TALKING about it?" It's almost gotten to the point where I don't want to admit to anyone new that I'm pregnant. Instead, I just want to say, "No, I'm just getting fat. Too many Dunkin Donuts, not enough exercise." Then I can walk away in peace.

The only thing worse than experiencing morning sickness is to hear someone else describe their own morning sickness in disgustingly accurate and vivid detail.

TMI, ladies, TMI!